The Amazing Misadventures of This and That

With this post, I put my foot through the doorway to destiny, and hopefully not into some kind of cheap comedy prop like a banana or that iconic comedian you like. See, I'm trying to keep my humor broad enough that it offends everyone, but people can't actually get mad at me for it, since I didn't point any fingers.

Except I am pointing one, and you know exactly where it's pointing.

It's actually not at my crotch this time, so please, look up here. I'm pointing forward, to a brighter, slightly less awkward future; a future in which the internet is rife with the seed of my humor.

Oh, also that Jen kid. She's just riding along on the coattails of my success, but please, feel free to read her stuff, too. We are one in the same--symbiotes, almost--so if she thrives, so, too, does the awesome might of this blog.

But we all know why you're really here. And whoever told you we were the ones with your wife, they were lying. But since we have your attention, why not stick around for a bit? Play some Parcheesi? Have some Pinot Grigio? Let us woo you, as a proper gentleman does a lady.

Then we can go back to my place and discuss how wonderful I am.

-Alex